Decisions

A young wahine lived in the small town of Lahaina on the island of Maui. She worked part time as a waitress at “Cheese Burger in Paradise” and surfed dawn patrol to get sponsors to come out and see her. One day Kaily finally landed a few small, local sponsors and things finally started to come her way. On a boat trip to Waimea Bay with two other wahines Kaily learned a lot about herself and about surfing.
Kaily’s family was originally from Portugal. Her parents moved over to the islands in the late sixties and fell in love with the sport of surfing. The entire family was very close. Kaily was the youngest at seventeen of her two brothers Kalem at twenty-two and Damon at nineteen. Kalem was an accomplished surfer with a lot of talent yet to be explored. Damon was on his way to “pro” status.

Being from a family of surfers, Kaily had a dream that she kept a secret. It was something that she wanted so bad and worked so hard for but never told anyone about. On this two week trip to Waimea Bay Kaily was given the opportunity of a lifetime. The opportunity that would make her dreams come true. One of the girls on the trip, Sarah, offered Kaily a sponsorship through her company “Ocean World” a clothing manufacturer. For Kaily this sponsorship meant leaving school in her senior year, graduating via U.S. postal service and seeing her family and boyfriend infrequently. Sarah gave Kaily three weeks to make a decision.

When Kaily returned from the trip she returned to her job of waiting tables and a pretty empty home. Damon and Kalem were on the mainland for a buddies wedding. Her boyfriend was also waiting tables and spent little time with her. Soon the third week ran out and Kaily made her decision after talking it over with her family, youth pastor, and school counselor. She called Sarah and notified her that she was ready for a contract.

The following night, Sean (Kaily’s boyfriend) came over to the house for dinner with the family. There he found out that his best friend and girl friend was about to leave on a grommet tour for a year.

Sean and Kaily’s relationship was one of deep trust and friendship. Sean had always been under the impression that he knew everything there was to know about Kaily. What hurt him most was the she never expressed any intention of joining the professional circuit. The news was more of shock to him than anything else, it was surreal.

Sean was twenty years old and was busting his butt to put a down payment on a house. He had hopes of asking Kaily to marry him some time in the future, a couple of years down the line. In the mean time he was working on having something to offer her. Kaily’s leaving meant that his hopes for marriage would have to be delayed, perhaps even permanently.

Outside the Kroh’s family home Kaily and Sean sat in a small white and green veranda facing the four foot waves crashing into the sand at sunset.

Kaily: “Sarah form ‘Ocean World’ offered me a one year contract with her company. I haven’t signed the contract yet because I wanted you to know about it first.”

Sean: “I don’t know whether to be happy or sad. I had no idea that you wanted to join the circuit, why didn’t you tell me?”

Kaily: “I never told anyone. It was a private dream I’ve always had. I’m tired of waiting tables and surfing dawn patrol just to be able to buy a new board. I want to try and see whether or not I have what it takes to make it.”

Sean: “Have a lawyer look over the contract and make sure that you understand all the specifics involved. I’ve got to to be honest and say that your decision broke my heart. I know that if I asked you to stay you would stay, and I would do the same for you. But I can’t have us both be miserable.”

Kaily: “I’m not going to be gone all year, just for a few national and international events. I’ll be in school some of the time and Dan is letting me be on call when I’m home.”

Sean: “When is your first contest?”

Kaily: “Not for a month. Training starts tomorrow, all day everyday except Sunday’s.”

Sean: “Ok, what are you doing on Tuesday? ‘Cuz I was thinking that we could meet at our spot around seven in the morning. I have the day off and there’s something that I have to talk to you about. So I’m thinking that we could spend the day together, if you’re not busy?”

Kaily: “No, no Tuesday’s good. Seven it is. Do you want to have breakfast, should I bring something along?”

Sean: “Bring your board, I’ll have the rest covered. I better get going it’s getting late. I’ve got an early session tomorrow.”

It was about eleven o’clock when Kaily walked Sean out. Everything went better than she’d hoped; Sean took the news pretty well she thought. Kaily went to bed shortly after Sean left.

In his black and grey ‘88 Blazer a few miles down the road Sean pulled over and sobbed to Mariah Carey’s “Butterfly” while his engine was still running. He was great at hiding his pain from others, especially from Kaily. In the entire time that he knew her he never let her see him cry. A few sad love songs later Sean headed home.

The next morning Sean went to the gym to burn some of that tension off. It was about 5:22 a.m. and Sean had already completed about five sets of ten on the bench press lifting four hundred and thirty pounds. As he was walking toward the stair master for a two mile climb up hill he bumped into Kaily. Kaily had been in the gym science five o’clock that morning doing laps in the pool. Both surprised to see each other said:

Kaily: “I didn’t know that you went to this gym?”

Sean: “There’s a lot that you don’t know.”

Kaily: “Care to elaborate?”

Sean: “ No I don’t, I want to be left alone, ok?”

Kaily: “It’s early I’ll leave you alone.”

Sean: “You know what? This has nothing to do with the time.”

Sean put on his head phones and climbed the stair master for about half an hour. Shortly after that he stretched and went to work.

Tuesday came, at seven o’clock in the morning Sean met up with Kaily and they went to a small coffee shop for juice and bagels. Sean handed Kaily a large twelve by twenty-four inch box decorated with pictures of his favorite surf spots. The box was filled with love letters that Sean wrote his future wife in hopes of giving them to her as a gift on their wedding night. On top of the box was a letter in an envelope with Kaily’s name on it.

Sean: “Read this letter before you open the box. If you have something to talk to me about after you’ve seen what’s in the box come by I’ll be home till four.

Kaily slightly smiled with a bit of a confused look on her face as Sean left the small coffee shop. Sitting at the small table in the shop Kaily began to read the letter enclosed in the envelope.


Dear Kaily,

I’ve watched us grow apart for months. Each day we share less and less in common. I stopped making you laugh and you stopped showing up to our Friday night sessions.

I have cried each night for months now. I can’t fall a sleep, so I write you letters. I put all the letters in a box and I planned on giving them to you on our wedding night. I decided to give you the letters now because I need to know whether or not you’re in this for the long-run.

After you read the letter you should have no problem deciding whether or not to stay or to go your own separate way. If you decide to stay I’ll be home so come by. If not than give me some time alone. I’ll come around when I’m ready.

Love You,
Sean


Kaily sat in that coffee shop for hours until she read all forty-two letters over several cups of hot herbal tea. When she was done she took a walk. Ten minutes later Sean opened his door in response to the sound of crisp door bell.

Kaily: “Hi, can I come in?”

Sean: “Come in. Would you like some tea?”

Kaily: “ Oh no, no thanks. No tea, I’m good. I just came over to talk to you, is it a good time?”

Sean: “Yeah, it’s fine, what did you want to talk talk to me about? Have a seat.”

Kaily: “I’m sorry I haven’t been coming to our sessions. I don’t have a reason why, I really don’t know why. We’ve grown apart, and maybe that’s why. I read all of your letters they’re beautiful. I’m sorry that you felt that you couldn’t talk to me.”

Sean: “Why are you here? You don’t need to apologies!”

Kaily: “I’m here because I want this to work out! Because I want you to tell me how you feel without second guessing yourself! I’m here because I want to be here for you!”

Sean: “It’s going to take time. I’m not just going to start sharing my deepest thoughts with you. You need to be patient, can you do that?”

Kaily: “ I can do that!”

Sean: “ I’m going to take a shower. I woke up from a nap when you rang the door bell. Do you want to go do something after I’m done?”

Kaily: “Sure, that sounds great.”

Sean: “Alright, I’ll be out in a few minutes.”

When Sean was finally ready to go they went to the beach and spent a few hours there talking about everything that he wrote in the letters.

Sean: “You know, I’m happy that you decided to work this out. I may not show you how happy I am , but I really am happy.”

Kaily: “I don’t expect everything to go back to the way it used to be. I want to get to know you again, spend more time with you.”

Sean: “That sounds good. I want to spend more time with you too.”

Kaily: “So, do you want to put in a few session?”

Sean: “Alright. Let’s go back, get a bite to eat and grab our boards. I just bought a 6'9" John Carve board. It’s totally awesome. It’s blue, yellow, and white with a big Jesus fish on it!

Kaily: “I just bought a belly button ring.”

Sean: “It looks good, did it hurt?”

Kaily: “Yes, it did hurt. But it doesn’t now, I’ve had it for a month.”

Sean: “ It looks like a lot has changed, but I can’t wait to hear all about it.”

Sean and Kaily worked things out over a period of a few months. Kaily stuck by her sponsors and is hoping to win a few contests soon. Kaily and Sean continued to date but are putting no pressure on their future together.